OPEN MIC ENCORE I

Up-dated October 6, 2002

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Carey

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   We three kings of Swan, Fish, and Plum, carry this pickle upon our thumb. We rest, we play, we sing, we are gay. love me, hate me, kill me.... you may.

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My heart skips a beat

every time you walk by.

Is it meant to be

or am I just headed for a fall?

I can't imagine my life without you.

Though the time has been short,

I love you more than life itself.

The thought of you leaving

brings tears to my eyes.

So now, I'll just pray...

Pray for you.

Pray for me.

Pray that one day, we'll be......

together.

~!~

Silently in her sleep she cries

Oh where has my life gone

With each tear her hope dies

For she,ll live this life alone

Sadness bares her very soul

And tears her heart in two

Taking her life as a whole

And tossing it askew

No hope that she will love again

For she never even tries

On her own she will remain

Until the day she dies,

             ~!~

Try and fix me

Just transfix me

To your body

And I can live

Like that

Loving     Kissing    Squawking

Slave

For you

A pretty   Piece of   Glut

To take

With you

Loving you

Just as if

You were my very own

My new safety

My new hook

And my new home

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   As he lay on the cold hard ground memories streaking through his tired mind as a fellow soldier drags him to an area where many other soldiers lay calling out to their mothers and loved ones.

   Lost in his own memories he blocks the sounds of all the others around him.  She had sent him a package three long years ago, in the package was the most brilliantly stitched hanker chief embroidered on the corner were the words WE LOVE YOU.

   He can hear the medics shouting out for help with the wounded, he feels them pushing down on his own wounds. "I can't stop the bleeding!" the words just linger in the air.

   Again his mind wanders to the hanker chief and the letter that had been sent with it.  The letter told of the baby girl that had been born.  A tear falls down his dirty face he can't feel the pain anymore, he knows his time has come.  The hand that once clutched the now tattered and torn cloth released it.

   Sitting on a porch swing watching a little girl play in the yard, a cab pulled into the drive.  Up walked the messenger bearing an American flag, a piece of paper, and a tattered torn cloth.

   She knew what the flag meant and she thought she would be ready for the day when it came to her, but deep down inside there was no getting ready for news like this.

   The messenger said that he was very sorry for their loss as he handed her the American triangle and turned to walk away.  Dropping to her knees, tears rolling down her face as the world stopped turning.

   All that this woman and her child had left of this American Soldier, husband and father was an old tattered and torn cloth that bore the words WE LOVE YOU.

I have built a wall around me,

To protect me from the snow,

But there is now snow here,

So the wall I have built,

Will protect me from harm,

It is built of books,

Knowledge and intelligence,

To keep me warm when I am cold,

To give me light when there is darkness,

To give me strength when I am weak,

But all walls fall,

The wall is only temporary,

And the foundations of it will grow,

But when the wind pushes it too hard,

Down it will come,

CRASH!

BANG!

SMASH!

My wall is no more,

I’ve lost the ones that I love most,

And I sit here by myself,

The youngest of a family,

I live the longest,

I see the most,

And I feel that when,

The world falls apart,

I’ll still be sitting here,

Just trying to rebuild my wall,

For an eternity more.

~!~

sitting alone in my room

in the middle of silence

something shifts

i look up and study small details

the pictures on the walls

straight

the kittens

        sleeping

the roses in the vase

        beautiful

i glance down

on the floor

a single rose petal

no harm done

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pain,hunger,addiction,valleys of the deep so swiftly run,

sorrows unfold,laying down to pray,only god knows,why i cry and never get fed,why the people that are called my parents so badly want me dead,time slithers like a snake, she waits to take her kill,laying here bloody again i wish she could find her pills,screaming inside yet only emptyness shows,tears run down my organs and again only god knows,why she calls me a bad girl ,why im the only one hurt,another life has passed and yet im still here,taking in the pain,never unleashing my fears,the blood trickles yet once more,and my stabbed body drops coldly to the floor,she has done it this time,she has won her fight,my mommy finally got what she wanted,she finally took my life.

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Look it's the tree!

The tree that I told you about

Its glamour is what I hoped you'd notice

It got me the first time as well

Pick a fruit, it's OK

At first I was also apprehensive

Sit in its shade, see like me

Lay on the grass, the soft grass which has the privilege to live around the trunk

Look up-the tree trunk leads to a thousand leaves dancing in the wind

You should be here in the fall, it's the most beautiful sight one can see

Wild gives it life; the branches love it-they can play and move in the air

Pick up that newly fallen leaf

Feel it and close your eyes-it's as soft as your dreams

You can dream here under the tree all you wish

Keep it a secret, please

Isn't it so lovely to see, a welcome from reality

You can cry under the tree when you feel a need

You can even sleep in its arms as they protect you from the sun and harmful worries

No one knows it exists, alone here in the mist of early morning

Ssshh! can you hear the birds sing? They are! Look up to see them share in this wonderful place

Now it's my time to go, I've only come here to show

Please keep it a secret from the rest, the outside must not touch the harmony here

Love it as I have, cherish its beauty like no other

Please, please don't say a word about the tree

I trust you, it's between you and me

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I met a innocent girl

she was beautiful in everyway

In all the ways I wanted

We fell in love

It couldn’t feel any better

But when it felt so right

I was making the biggest mistake

I took pieces away from her

the same pieces i fell for

there almost all gone

she’s not the same

I can't love like i did

I see she wants something else

She left me because the pieces were gone

I destroyed them, I left them

I can no longer have her

I don't want her, I want the pieces

But there gone now she’s gone now

she’s something I would never want

And I can't blame her, I created her

can't speak, It hurts to bad

something I've worked on

became something I am ashamed of

You call what we have love

To me, I call it murder

I thought I gave love but in return

I got dumped, and self pain

knowing i created what she is

words can no longer save her

I have already used them

Actions can no longer stop her

she has already had them

Loving her can't bring her back

Because the pieces I love

are gone, destroyed, torn off

By what I thought was love

but what ended up giving pain.

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I control me, my feelings, my thoughts, and my destiny.

I believe in truth, life, the power of God and the ability to love.

I recognize my weakness's, my strengths, and the privilege to learn.

I learn from my mistakes, my accomplishments, and from those I am surrounded by.

I do my best and give my all, everyday, and in all I do, I always will.

I seek in life, happiness, love, and a sense of completion.

I journey through life with an eager heart, a strong mind and a will to conquer.

I am only me, created by God, guided by my parents, to be my personal perfection.

I strive to exceed all personal standards, stand true to my morals, and fulfill all desires.

I live for me.

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It's the way the wind blows

On those warm sunny days

And how the moon glows

In the dark woods and its mysterious ways.

Or the way you can sit

And let some things go unspoken,

Knowing that every day

My heart will get broken.

It's the way I sit and wait,

Hoping, praying, and pleading

That you can hear my heart

And all of its silent bleeding.

But I know that it is the way

More hearts get broken

Because someone stopped caring,

And more and more words are left unspoken

Because you couldn't see; you couldn't hear.

Now here I am left

With only the sound of silence and no one to dry my tear.

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I was patient. You were someone worth waiting for.

We were together, yet I somehow wanted more.

There was so much between us, a love that was unspoken.

Then we had to say goodbye and our friendship was suddenly broken.

But you went home to her, a love you always knew.

And I am now left alone with these memories I have of you.

Your smiling eyes and tender heart. The little boy you could often be.

An innocence I had never seen. The honesty you had with me.

You told me you could never leave her, a thought I pushed aside.

I thought I could change your mind, but over this I often cried.

I knew I was being hurt, at the same time you were too.

My stubbornness only made it worse. To myself I was untrue.

Now I sit here in the dark, wondering why I can't let go.

All I can do is love you, but there's nothing left to show.

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in the time when flowers cease to bloom.

when mothers cease to carry in their womb.

i will love you then, and after.

when farmers stop their prayers for rain.

when there is no sorrow, joy, or pain.

i will love you then, and after.

at the point when the minstrels stop their songs.

when none draw the line between right and wrong.

i will love you then, and after.

neither miles nor time can stop my passion.

and no mortal man can bring me grief.

because my love for you is everlastin'

and when God tells me it's time to leave,

i will love you then, and after.

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I was following the lost flower child

while drowning in the humidity of liquid lavender

a lone pilgrim

just passing through this life

this world can never deliver peace

because in it live

cavemen and toothless cowboys

with no passion for souls

they don't realize the pathetic-ness of forced insight

or have a ready mind

they just stay within their red zone

and can't see outside of their box

the sides are too high

and they don't realize that they can climb out

if only they could see

the beauty that awaits them

on the other side

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I’m all caught up in a wind tunnel of thoughts

with no where to run no where to hide

the more I think the bigger the wind tunnel gets

it just keeps twisting and turning and turning and twisting

eventually this tornado of thoughts will break loose

reeking havoc on all people who stand in its way

leaving them with no where to run and no where to hide

just like me trying to hide from my thoughts

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         Freezing knowing it is my time, am I being myself or

        Just living a lie? Thinking of all the things running

        in my head should I speak my thoughts or let them be

        dead? Standing solo trying to let it all out but is I

        do I know I will be without. Paranoid insecurities keep

        tearing me down while my foolish self-righteous words

        keep spilling all about. Down with the words that bring

        people to the ground. Hiding behind this is what keeps

        me around. I can't take back anything I say all I can do

        is apologize and live another day. With no direction I

        feel to blame. Everything that is done seems to wear my

        name. What is with my head? Am I going insane? Running

        threw my brain. Living,loving,wanting to be needed.

        Compulsive,destruction,my hidden rage. Fearing,loathing,

        leave it all behind.Freezing feeling like I've committed

        a crime.

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Flowing down a gentle stream,

I drift away in midday's dream.

Time moves by the dusk of day,

And moonlight streaks across the way.

Rising up by mornings sun,

With youthful daytime wind I run.

Over hills and through the meadows,

I follow on a trail of pedals.

At the end of trail I see,

My beautiful lady waiting for me.

Set down in the flowing stream,

She sits and waits inside my dream.

As I go to hold my love,

I wake up to the stars above.

Lost and sad I search to find,

It's still a dream inside my mind.

All my life I've wished to be,

With my true love eternally.

Why can't this one wish come true?

It's all I've ever asked from you.

~!~

forever smiling kind and warm,

now i cry for you one tear dies a new is reborn.

so young so smart an angel truly from above

your time cut short and taken from those you love.

refusing to believe all i could hear,

thinking of you brings me to tear.

i want to let you go,i tried but i can't

you have engraved a permanent place deep in my heart.

gone forever no longer whole,

physically absent but here I’m mind spirit and soul!

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A weak child

Whose strength lies

Only in the midst

Of her shoes.

The determination

Whose hue is Faint

Emerges from Her swollen extremities.

Indecisive of her Confession,

Quiet qualms live inside of the

Deterred body

Which she resides in.

No one knows

Only she has the

Option of letting the

Truth which her

Innocent shamed soul

Feels can only

Kill her

Out.

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nobody knows when pain will knock

capture your moment until it ends and stop

you go through so many phases

only to find yourself running the same paces

your life looks you in the eye

and tells you 'you're fine' but your heart says you know that's a lie

believe in my philosophy:

take new opportunities and speak steady stabilities

take a reflection of your soul

look beyond today, tomorrow, and into the future when you're old

wishing you could do this and do that

only if you could changed the hands of time back

they seem scared of life and what it will do

succeed in your perfect arts and paint a picture of you

my words will not allow me to write anymore confusion

it's just my dark dreams are shining a bright delusion

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Inside there’s a hurt the hurts so deep, So deep it hurts to keep.

Sometimes I don’t know what to expect, I do know one thing it herts like reject. They say Its called love, Yet not to me, Its a feeling know one can ever see. Where to begin This long story, I don’t know if i should cry or be sorry, feelings are locked twisted around they scream wanting out yet don’t make a sound.

Witch path to take course its a journey inside, its not a walk its a ride

Past the pain down to the sole, To the face that made me feel whole, Flashes go by like a near death thing, Then out loud yet silent I start to sing, a song a story that reminds me of him, Ooooo Its a game I badly want to win.. Past the face, down 1 stair, Memories I never new where there, That’s when I realized, This just isn’t fair.. Back up like a big wow twisted directions I never Know, In a place iv never been, His face like iv never seen, Here's the point where I just need to cry, eyes fill up burn like fire, Body feels week it loves this desire, Eyes closed shut the whole time, Cant open them, there right now not mine, The sole and heart are playing this game, The minds left out They call it The Blam, Nerves to what’s next I breath real slow, I start to think, there we go Mind comes back, The heart gave in, the sole cries, Over on repeat this game is played, Its coming again I’m gunna get me some Gatorade lol

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   I sit here with this paper and this pin,

   whishing I could let you in,

   Into my world, my heart, my mind,

   looking for words, words I'll never find.

   Words to invite you...to enlighten you to me,

   To let you see who I use to be.

   Letting you see I wasn't always so uptight,

   I use to be able to sleep at night.

   I didn't always have to hide away,

   Now locked inside my mind, I must stay.

   I want break lose from these chains that hold

   me in,

   I wana break lose from within!

   But I can't you see,

   Because I forgot what its like to be me.

   Maybe I'll remember and stay that way forever.

   But for now its just me, myself, and....I

   Forgot who else.

~!~

ONE SWEET DAY
ARIEN ABIGAEL  AGUILAR

I LOOKED OUTSIDE AND SAW THE POURING RAIN,

I HOPE GOD KNOWS IM IN PAIN,

LONELINESS HAS SHUT ME OFF FROM

I THE WORLD,

THE WORLD THAT GAVE ME SO MANY REASONS TO HATE IT,

THE PEOPLE WHO TORE MY HEART BIT BY BIT,

THE THINGS THAT MADE ME FEEL THAT IM ALONE,

THESE FOUR WALLS NEVER BECAME MY HOME,

SO LONELY DWELLING IN THE DARK,

I WONDER IF HEAVEN CAN HEAR MY CALL,

I WONDER IF MY ANGEL IS HERE WITH ME AT ALL,

I LISTENED TO MYSELF AND THE SILLY THINGS IN MY MIND,

TRULY THIS EXPERIENCE OF MINE IS ONE OF A KIND,

I ASKED MYSELF IF I STILL HAVE FAITH,

I ASKED FOR STRENGTH SO THAT I COULD WAIT,

FOR ALL THE PAIN TO LEAVE MY DOORS,

I ASKED FOR HOPE TO KEEP ME GOING,

I ASKED FOR LOVE THAT WOULD MAKE LIFE WORTH LIVING,

I ASKED FOR SOMEONE TO COME MY WAY,

A SOUL THAT WOULD TOUCH ME ONE SWEET DAY...

~!~

You have a dream to be the best you

Can be or to follow someone’s footsteps

Life is strange with its twists and turns as

Everyone of us sometimes learns

When things go wrong, as they sometimes will,

When the road your traveling seems all up hill

You always seem to keep going and never quite.

You follow the path that is always lit

You can never tell how close you are, it maybe

Near when it seems so far

You stop to think where is everyone else,

You don’t really care because this is your dream

And no one else.

~!~

As I rise to the morning skies

My mind is reminded of the day

I laid eyes on an angel that

was born and nurtured by the heavenly sky.

An angel that I will hold tight,

to my soul a future pride.

I sigh to the thought that you might be mine.

Wishing I can reach that height,

that height that’s a million feet high.

Which possesses the divine nights

that i swear would cherish for a thousand lifetimes.

I will reach my goal

and achieve my forever happiness.

Where i will console my sadistic torture,

and finally live with my great fortune...My angel.

When you come back from the clouds,

stay, and i swear i keep you proud

Because I am constricted in my own pain

for the longing to see you again is just unbearable,

I feel lost without you it's a damn shame

that someone of a life like mine has raised to this...

A weary traveler with no place to sit,

A suicidal maniac who can't handle it,

No healthy aid and sick,

A life where there's nothing else to do but give in...

I woke up this morning with your angelic face in mind,

Soon your heart will be mine... and your soul, I promise i will

find...

~!~

There was magic in it

Death pulling back from life

Youth extracting its essence

From an age grown chaotic

Then there was new life

Like a spring endangered twig

Poised

Timorous

In the evening sun remembered

To live

Or perhaps forever die...

~!~

hurt me

so i can love you more

play me so that ill wait for your calls

leave me

so that i'll want to be with you more

avoid me

 so you will make me fall

Timeless

if i die today

i won’t regret yesterday

because i had your hands to hold

your lips to kiss and your eyes to stare at

and i know you won’t be sad

because we'll meet tomorrow

~!~

I lay there crying filled with pain,

I wanted so much to feel relief from it,

I cried my tears,

I wiped them away,

I cried again and felt so lost,

I felt a feeling of comfort,

I don’t mind sharing,

I felt its strength it filled me then,

I took its hands and felt it inside,

It made me float above the pain,

It gave me wings to carry me,

It gave me hope,

I never thought I’d feel,

A bird I heard singing outside my window,

In the dark it sang,

I listened my heart so full of joy,

And at last I slept, the pain now gone

Removed, replaced by happiness I cannot hide.

~!~

My poetry is my soul

My freedom

My expression

My obsession

My confession

My poetry is my blunt

My poetry brings me to levels of

depression,expression,happiness,

sadness and sexuality. It leaves

me raunchy,wanted,lost, relieved,

excited,upset,relaxed,controlled.

No more great expectations of

these sublime contutions of ritual

infusions. Choosing privacy of

protection of un-bound,beautiful

perfection. Arrangements of my

taste, my love, my-izm, my lyrics,

my straws. Attention it's my

experience of timeless, thoughts,

loves, huddles up inclusive

cleaning of my heart, my mind,

my soul.

My poetry is my soul

My freedom

My expression

My obsession

My confession

~!~

Be4 we know it we are blood thirsty, plotting death. Subconsciously pactin with the prince, so traceable are our steps, living and telling half truths only giving hints, not telling if u aren’t with the king, u ARE with the prince, foundating on lies made of cotton, comfortably sleeping on what we think exists, unwillingly waking up to find ourselves in a fiery pit, we look at life thru glasses of lies and misinterpretations, which entitles "brought to you by the makers of the One World Nation", we give up our mind to satisfy our ego. To be accepted into the materially free show, the show of educated fools, and untalented all stars, where truth rides over our heads like fast tall cars, is there anyone else that sees what I see? Someone else that feels its necessary to get free? When this question is asked, talkers come in herds, but seldom are there actions that match up with their words, maybe its different thoughts we’re feeding on, that makes us love to be dishonestly leading on. So maybe we should consciously think for ourselves, while our keepers egotistically drink to themselves, we are like animals put away that can only come out to do certain accepted tricks, and can’t come out to stop the world from being totally fixed, we need to throw down our self-images and do what He is saying, cuz if we don’t its our own souls we are paying. Enough is enough, we need to shed the skin of repressment and pride, and come out with the things we normally try to hide. And when we do this with all delight, our eyes will open, and be un blinded by the light. I can see it in all and mostly you, don’t pretend, take my hand and lets get born again.

~!~

   As I look through the land of the free,and the brave I see a giant yawning from It's nap. He stands wounded,from the three arrows that have struke him.Fury and power can be seen through his eyes, he yells and charges because he is hurt. The giant is stronger than ever, bolder than ever, and as I look from Hawaii to the Coast of New York I see an amazing thing that from the ashes of September 11. The Giant has wakened.

~!~

* I lOVE YOU *
GAIL

   i love everything about you

   your amazing smile, your style,

   your warm caring arms. to hold

   me tight all of those lonely

   cold nights. your tight body

   you are build like a greek god.

   you make me complete, im am so

   glad you are in my life. you

   keep me so very happy it is true.

~!~

    And if only for a moment

    In this life

    I will sit with you

    and just think about today

    I will sit and listen

    and let today

    tell me stories of tomorrow

    when

    I know in my heart

    that my tomorrows day's

    will be filled with yesterday's memories

    of you and I

    under this tree

    that I now call "LIFE"

~!~

I cry too

you wake up in the morning so confused

not knowing what ur going to do

looking at yourself in the mirror

trying to explain her

the girl that is staring back at you

you kno who this girl is too

she's the one that everyone see's

but doesn’t look deep enough to see the real me

im not that always happy girl that everyone knows

im that girl who sometimes feels alone

i feel and i bleed just like everyone else

but why do i feel less

like i cant feel and bleed like people around me

i have to pretend that i can’t bleed

but i bet they didn’t know i cry too

~!~

My house is ashes

My car is light

My friends are lying

Where is my world?

My parents are dying

My sister can’t stop lying

Where is my world?

~!~

Everything I say, Is everything I do It's everything I am

It's everything but you

I should know your expressions,

But when you look at me

You leave no impressions

When you speak

I think I understand

But I only hear

I never listen

Your words resound through my head

Never reaching my heart

It's not quite over, but it's to late to start

This wasn't how it was supposed to be

It wasn't the right way at all

To forget about everything

Is to close my eyes and fall

But I'm never mad

You're the greatest thing

I wish I never had

~!~

'Out of the Ashes'
to all of those we lost one year ago 9-11-01
Patrick Mazza

Out of the ashes the voices rise

Listen to their pleading cries

Not of pain, not of sorrow

But of freedom for tomorrow

Thousands of voices united as one

Say 'Never forget what they have done'

Men and women, husbands and wives

They took away so many lives

But brought together a nation that grieves

A nation that so strongly believes

That freedom's foundation on which we stand

Will not be broken by terrorist hands

It will not crumble, it will not fall

Forever standing, proud and tall

~!~

there are days that I remember

spent as wasted youth

crowding round the family centered

songs sung for breasts to soothe

huddled form cold by bright hot cinders

breathing air as clear as morning

friendly laughs as children giggle

those days end with no warning

should we cower deep in darkness

and let our enemy win?

Or throw back shades made thick by fear

to let warm sunlight in

we‘ll stand up proud we will not fall

as we walk through these days

though black as night we see the light

for we‘ve heard freedoms call

there‘ll be days they will remember

spending wasted youth

crowding round the family centered

songs sung for the heroes gone

sing liberty and justice for all

for we answered with freedoms song

DWA   0123CET  2aug02

~!~

I'm mad, I'm sad, I'm depressed and I hurt

Everyone around me treats me like dirt

You think there would be peace for a kind soul as me

Seems but life goes on - handing out negativity

Wish I could put all my negs - in a pan to fry

Cook 'em up and feed 'em to Ward - to die

That would be one less negative thorn in my side

And help me get closer and help me abide

It just seems - when one disaster is through

Less than three more will start to brew

There has got to be an end to all these negs I find

If not already gone - I'll probably loose my mind

World negs? you ask, - Yes, I must share some of those

Could they be fixed by me? - I don't suppose

A perspective between those and those of mine--

Hmm - Actually - Forget it! - I guess I am fine

~!~

She sits in the corner cradling herself hysterically,

While in the background a child screams painfully,

She wonders how she ever got herself into this mess,

Please shut up… she silently screams at her baby.

Is it possible for a child to mother a child?

She had a romantic notion that she could handle it,

How wrong she had been in her assumptions,

Which on is more of a mess, mother or child?

Finally she gathers the courage,

She slowly rises and approaches her baby,

She stares at him awhile contentedly,

Suddenly hatred glazes her eyes,

She remembers all that this baby has cost her,

Not just mere material possessions, but her life,

This baby has taken every second of her life away,

Cost her every dollar she has earned.

She hastily looks around the room,

She finds what she is looking for,

Grabbing the pillow she takes it over to the crib,

Slowly she pushes the pillow harder down on the baby’s face.

She holds it there until she is certain the baby is dead,

When she lifts the pillow the baby’s face is somewhat distorted,

She lifts her baby and gives it one last cherished kiss,

Then she places it back into the crib.

She calmly walks to the kitchen and reaches for a garbage bag,

She returns to the baby’s crib and lifts her baby into the bag,

Then she quietly walks to the Grundy bin outside her apartment,

Placing the small package in the bin, strangely she feels no remorse.

~!~

Behind the lost meadows of time…

Lies a child… From the center of her white, elaborate dress…

A blood spring pours onto the trees… And the trees are alive…

Full of colorful flowers…

Full of hopes… Full of desires…

Full of love… A love that caused her demise…

That slaughtered her childish dreams…

Her emerald eyes flicker no more…

Her white skin radiate no light…

Her twisted curls no longer shine…

Her little fingers softly touch the prairie… A sweet, gentle touch…

That livens the roots… That makes the forest evergreen…

The trees grow all about her… Their roots embrace her…

Their strong arms protect her…

Their foliage hides her from all spying eyes…

And she becomes the empathy of the forest…

Her blood is the foundation of existence…

Her beauty is the source of splendor…

But she grows no more… Yet, I live on…

With the child murdered inside me… A body… With no core…

~!~

Prison in my mind
T.Brunner 

Desperate thoughts surface from a once sound mind.

Anger and confusion amongst the hopelessness circle inside.

Trapped with no escape from this prison of sadness.

No answers can be found in this delusional madness.

With no one to turn to and no where to go.

I ask of my heart for the answers but it has long ago turned cold.

Faster & faster I sink into the quicksands of desperation.

Logic and sanity could not survive this duration.

My words have now become ramblings of the mindless.

There is no ray of hope which can penetrate my tear induced blindness.

~!~

I hate you, I hate you

I swear to it, its true

I don’t need you, I cant stand you

I'm glad that we are through

I wish it, I think it

I want it to be true

but as much as I try

I can’t hate you.

You've hurt me not once, not twice

but way over three times

all the rivers in the world couldn't

hold all the tears I've cried

SO when I say I hate you

and I'm glad that we are through

You know in your heart that this could

never be true.

~!~

Her name was Sable...and she was beautiful...I wish I could have saved her...I wish I could have stopped the pain...she was a beautiful black cat...and I love her with all of my heart...when I think about her final moments I want to cry...but I am angry too...the world is not same as it was last Thursday...before God took her away...maybe someday I will understand...she was Gods greatest work...rest in peace my child...

The sorrow drowns in the wake of the night.

Surrender your heart with the break of the light.

With the morning dew enter in.

Invite the Holy Spirit to dwell within.

As his peace lavishes you from head to toe.

Be empowered and touch the people you know.

Some days will be great.

Other days will be small.

Working to benefit the kingdom will benefit us all.

~!~

The only true racist

Rode in on a Dark Horse

Electrified the world

And freed all slaves.

Never stumbled, never fell, As she walked with her graceful spell. Head

held high in to the far beyond, Turning heads as she passed, Her hair

shinning a bright blond. My memory of her is fading fast. Now that I

stand in the same place as she, I wonder where she went, Some say they saw

her flee, from the time she spent. I remember the way she danced, When the

sun would set, Floating as she pranced, When the night she met. A bag of

confidence at her waist, Where she kept her beating Heart, When one day she

was faced, With the time she had to depart. The sun was high over my head,

When the news came to me, She has gone, was what they said, I wondered how

it could be. A long coldness came the next week, As I walked the same road

as she, It was the girl I went to seek, The same one inside of me. In to

the forest I pranced, Where darkness filled the air, Looking for the place

the girl danced, The one that was so fair. A bag of confidence at my side,

I touched as I did spy, A shiver that I tried to hide, I saw a white bird

fly. As it flew away from me, I knew what I had found, It was the girl I

did see, She talked to me with out a sound. When I walked back from the

far beyond, Turning heads as I passed, With my hair shinning blond, My

memory returning fast. Now that I stand in the same place as she, A man

looking at me so stern, He used to talk about the girl that did flee, But

now the girls return.

I can see you but I will not follow

I can hear you but I will not abide

I can smell you but I will not be obliged

I can feel you but I will walk away

Oh just leave me alone

Set my soul and spirit free

Oh please just let me go

Can you stop breathing my me?

What difference does it make?

were destined to be damned for our fathers’ sake,

prisoners behind the bars of faith,

roaming through life as wraiths, aimless.

In the eyes of our god were the sons of evil men,

who scorched the earth and opened the pen, of hell.

A bridge of many colours,

A beauty for us all,

To see in all it's splendor,

To look back, and to recall,

In times of deepest darkness,

Look to the sky and see,

Amid the wettest rainfall,

On a rainbow bridge you'll be.

Lately you've been acting so strange

And things between us change

I'm confused and I don't know what to do

Should I stay or should I go?

You're my angel and you gave me all

But you also caused my fall

I know you're meeting someone new

And it makes me feel lonely and blue

You still love me that's what they say

And it makes me want to stay

Others say I should let go of you

And I have to give up my relationship with you

Should I stay or should I go

Please tell me now I need to know

I love you so much that's what I can say

And letting you go can cause so much pain

~!~

~!~

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